


You left a heart behind

by ForeverDoesntExist



Series: Eurovision Song Challenge [28]
Category: Figure Skating RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: And Yuzuru, EurovisionSongChallenge, Gen, Javier and feels, M/M, Return to your land, albania
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:48:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22961953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForeverDoesntExist/pseuds/ForeverDoesntExist
Summary: Why are you here?Someone had asked him that question ten years ago.Javier never quite found an answer.
Relationships: Javier Fernández & Yuzuru Hanyu
Series: Eurovision Song Challenge [28]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1620127
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	You left a heart behind

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Junliet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Junliet/gifts).



> For day 25 I got Albania (2019) - Return to your land by Jonida Maliqi
> 
> A big hug to Junliet that helped us to not give up throughout this madness.
> 
> This is an unrelated drabble, unlike the other Yuzuvier ones :P

**One day you live**

**The next day you die**

**Yearning, with little hope**

**Alone, with no identity**

“Why are you here?”

Javier thinks about an answer for years.

When he had left Spain and followed a Russian coach blindly to an unknown American city, he had asked that question to himself many times at night, when he had forgotten what day it was or if he had eaten a full meal that day.

When he had tried his best to smile in front of his crappy laptop camera and assured his parents that everything was fine, that no he didn’t more money and that yes his coach was the most lovable man he had ever met.

When Morozov asked him why he had left his country in the first place if he didn’t intend to practice seriously and waste his parent’s money.

When he met Sergei and he watched him almost break his back on some ridiculous exercise that would probably not end well.

When Javier and Sergei had both cried together huddled up in some hotel room after a bad competition.

When he had done his absolute best and still failed miserably at his first Olympics.

When he watched a lanky kid surpass him and win an Olympic medal right in front of him four years later.

And when he won his first World Champion title, he thought he could answer finally answer it. He had finally understood why he was there. Why he had left his home and the comfort of his mother’s arms.

He was there for a dream.

And until he had it in his hands. He would be there.

After the glory and after the congratulatory handshakes, the hugs and the kisses goodbye, as he watched his family leave the arena to catch their flight back home, to Javier it seemed like the answer he had fought so hard to get, was slipping through his fingers as the emptiness settled in.

“Why are you here?”

He didn’t know.

**Return to your land**

**You left a heart behind**

Years later, Javier found out another answer.

This time in the shape of a former rival, a long time friend and in the end, a lover. He had finally found a reason to stay, a reason to forget that bleeding wound that reminded him of everything that he had left behind.

Of everything that he had missed and sacrificed by staying separated from his land.

Things that he would never get back, moments that he would be part of. But as he woke up in Yuzuru’s arms, he believed that not getting recognized every time he met the younger members of his family whenever he visited them, was completely worth it.

So, once he had been sure of why he had let go of a part of him so many years ago, he asked Yuzuru the same question.

“Why am I here?”

Yuzuru hadn’t answered. He understood.

Because when you love someone, you can only wish for them to be complete.

Because love is not selfish.

Yuzuru had been the last one by the gates to send him off back to Spain.

**Return to your land**

**You know a heart awaits you there**


End file.
